i need ur help PLEASE i am desperate...and pregnant at 13?

Question

****FIRST THINGS FIRST
if your goin to judge me then carry on...i know i have made a mistake and i dont need you to remind me beause im pretty sure im goin to be reminded for the rest of my life.

So i am 13...and pregnant.

u dont know what its like to have no friends at a new schooll.....i thought the coolest guy in school was in love with me....all of a sudden i had tons of friends and everyone new my name....i was invited to all the parties...espicially one were he had to talk to me privately in his freinds bedroom (HE CLAIMED THE ONLY QUIET PLACE IN THE HOUSE) **( his friend had told me that he was going to give me my first kiss and tell me he loved me....so i didn't think twice aout going in there with him cause thatts what i wanted) so we went in and he did exactly that...but then he started touching my chest and but and i thought o well hes a guy ya no no biggee.....i was wrong....he wanted more...i agreed to get naked just to show our love for eeachother and nothing more......well i guess he had panned more than that....because we started kissing and then so on and so forth...

Please dont judge me this night has been haunting me for the last month and a half...then i got an unexpected surprise.....missed my "." so i got a test from the drug store and u guessed it...prego....i went to the clinic and they said it was true...

so i have human babyb inside me and im still a little kid...

so i need help of course...

anybody that has gone through the same thing i really need ur help.....


How do i tell my mom and dad??
(IM KEEPING THE BABY NO WAY AM I TAKING A HUMAN LIFE BECAUSE I MADE A STUPID MISTAKE)

sohuld i tell the "daddy"


and any other advice please?



and to end it on a soft note....

how bout sophia for a baby girl..
and Aaden for a baby boy..

i already love my baby even though i know the consequences for my self and he/she.....im not proud of what i have done....but im not going to hang my head or let others defeat me...im going to stand strong for me and my baby............thanks :)


sarah

xx

Answer 1

Sophia and Aaden are beautiful names, first of all.. The only way to tell your parents is to just tell them! Trust me- I am 27 yrs old and pregnant with my first, and it was just as hard for me to tell my parents that I got pregnant out of wedlock... VERY hard to do! It doesn't matter how old you are.



I commend you for wanting to accept responsibility for your actions... Even us adults sometimes find it hard to do.



And lastly, Yes, you need to tell the "daddy", but you need to tell him AND his parents together, along with your parents... He may not take it as good as you have, so you need your support system there with you. Hopefully, that's what they will be.



Good luck sweetie!

Answer 2

well first off ur the most intelligent sounding 13 year old i have ever saw type. u sound like an adult. well this is extremley tough and life changing. first tell ur parents i know it will be hard and really scary but ur baby needs care and all of that soon. of course they will be mad that is a given but they will evntually have to get over it and help u. wow i dont know if a thirteen year old can even get any type of assitance when they live with there parents. umm can ur parents afforrd to help u take care of this baby. i hope so becasue no way can a thirteen year old do it on there own. tell the dad of course but dont expect him to stick around i almost garentee he wont. tell ur parents before u tell him so he cant try and talk u into an abortion. i definetly dont agree with what u have done it wasnt the smartest but i am very proud that u have realized u have made a mistake and want to dot he right thing instead of killing an innocent child. when u tell ur parents they will probably no more what to do then i can tell u. and this names are really nice. wish the best for u and contact me if u have any more questions.

Answer 3

You are going to want to inform your parents although it is going to be rough. You want to make sure that you get regular check ups to keep you and your baby health and safe. The best way to tell your parents is by being honest. You realized that you made a mistake and that it can not be undone. If you are afraid to tell them by yourself enlist a family member or another adult you trust to help, like a pastor or counselor.



Your parents can help you inform the "daddy" and his parents. It will be hard because sometimes men do not always step up. But you want to make sure to have a paternity test done when the baby is born because it takes two to tango and he should help support his child. Just take it one day at a time and make sure you get medical treatment for you and your growing baby. I wish you the best of luck and though you made a mistake you are on the right path because you owned up to it.

Answer 4

Well first of all your extremely brave for keeping the baby at only 13, not a lot of girls would do this at such a young age.

You NEED to tell your parents because since you are still young you need to be tracked down by a doctor because your body is still immature you may harm the baby and yourself if you're not looked after by a doctor.



Of course you have to tell the father because it takes two to tango. He made this baby as well as you did, so he HAS to know and he HAS to step up, and if he doesnt I strongly encourage you take him to court.



If you need anyone to talk to you can message me !

Also, let me know how things are going!



Also, remember this happened for a reason, once you see your beautiful baby it'll all be worth it I promise you, but also you have to remember it will be very very very hard!

Answer 5

I think that if you present this to your parents with the same rationale and conviction that you used to post here, you will be in good shape! Things happen. It's not the end of the world. Your parents will give you the general run down of disappointment and blah blah. But you seem to have a good head on your shoulders, all things considered, and that comes from a variety of sources, but most likely from your parents. That being said, they will most likely be angry and disappointed and probably freak out, but I think that if you get your calm sensibility and love from them, they will help you through it. Just be honest. And like I said, just present it to them, the way you did here. Good luck Sarah! Best wishes for a happy, healthy baby! BTW, I like Sophia and Aaden very much!



-Amanda

Answer 6

Sarah - First matters first. I by no means had a baby at thirteen, however it's SO essential that you just inform your father and mother instantly. Obviously they will discover out, so the earlier the bigger. That on my own will make you think plenty bigger. They will as a rule be disappointed/mad/dissatisfied, however inform them what your plan of motion is. Second, make certain you're taking good care of your self. Eat healthful meals and take your nutrients. Prenatals are frequently relatively harsh ( I'm pregnant with my second correct now and I have by no means been ready to take prenatals, they make me so unwell!) so you'll be able to take the flinstone nutrients and devour plenty of lettuce! Schedule an appointment with an OBGYN asap as a way to begin tracking babys development. If you relatively wish to maintain the child and lift it you wish to make certain you're having a healthful one! As a ways as telling the daddy, I feel I might, simply in order that he might realize. I bet that relatively is determined by the connection, however perhaps there may be a way you'll be able to get a few aid from him. Please after the child make certain you're training reliable intercourse! P.S. I love the identify Sophia - it was once truthfully one of the crucial names I was once when you consider that! Good success with the whole thing!

Answer 7

13 is young, but it's not the end of the world, it's just the beginning. You can make a good life for yourself and you child. But you need to let your mom know. It's hard but girl you need to do it. I hope she's there for you. I had a baby young and then another baby . Still young. Try to stay in school and see if there's a school you can go to and take your baby. We have one here where I live. Just ask around. I wish you luck and if you need someone to talk to I'm here for you.



good luck.

Answer 8

WOW!!

for you being so young

you are so responsible & are thinking clearly..

im sure you'll be a good mother even though you're young you are making the right decisions already for your bby..



it's gonna be hard regardless but im sure your parents will be there for you & help you out

you should tell the baby's daddy just because he has the right to know & his parents need to know so they can help you out financially with the baby



GOD BLESS YOU :D



& i love the names [[my mom's name is sophia :D]]

Answer 9

Oh honey, I am so sorry. Your story just made me so sad for you. But it seems like you're making the best of your situation. You need to tell your parents exactly what you said on here. And if you're too scared to say it, just show them this post. They won't be angry, sweetie, I promise. Something really bad happened to you and it wasn't your fault. Just make sure you tell them as soon as possible so you can go to the doctors and get everything taken care of. Both of those names are lovely. Good luck with everything, God bless <3

Answer 10

Congratulations on being so mature about your child. You are right that abortion is no solution. Good for you. You will never regret having this child in your life. It won't be easy, but it never is, and you are going to grow and learn from this if you allow yourself to. Every day provides a new challenge for us; it's up to us to accept or reject that challenge, and if we accept it, we grow.



Your parents need to know as soon as possible. There is no easy way to tell them. They will be very upset at first, but if you go to live with a friend or relative for a couple of days, or even a week or two, they will calm down. It may be awkward and tough at first, but give it time. Whatever you do, stay strong. Get through this and you will get through anything.



Educate yourself about how to prepare for a baby. There are ways to significantly reduce costs, such as breastfeeding, using cloth diapers instead of disposables, making your own baby food when the time comes for that, and buying baby items second hand. Really, these things will save you thousands. Tell this to your parents and they may panic less and see that you are mature and practical. If you can do it/make it yourself, never buy it. You will save so much money.



Stay in school. Find out about tutors, homeschooling or going to a school for teen moms. Pursue your dreams.



Ignore people who say your life is ruined by a child, because it's a lie. Yes, there are some things you will have to sacrifice or postpone, but they are either not worth having or they will be available to you again at a later time. Life will move on, baby and all. You can pursue your dreams and keep your goals. A baby can't and won't ruin you; you alone can ruin your life, no one else. A child is a great responsibility, but such a gift, such a wonderful gift. Don't forget about all the positives when you're discouraged by the thought of the responsibility. You and the baby will learn and grow together, day by day. Just take it one minute at a time. Having a child in your life will help you to mature, to realize what is most important in life, and to make healthier decisions.



The baby's father needs to know that he is a father. If he wants no part in the child's life, he will need to pay child support.



There are places that can help you and this baby for free if you need it, whether it's help with housing, medical care, employment, talking to your parents, baby supplies, etc. Here are some links:



http://birthright.org/htmpages/locate.htm

http://optionline.org/



There is also a great site for teen moms:



http://standupgirl.com/



Putting your baby up for adoption is a wonderful solution if you are desperate, but I urge you to really consider keeping your baby yourself. You can be a wonderful teen mom if you set your mind to it, get the support you need, and understand what will be required of you. No one is every 100% ready for motherhood; you are not alone. One day at a time, one day at a time... A baby needs his/her birth mother, and you need your child as well. You are already bonding with this child, and of course you are; you are a mother right now, and that bond is something that will never disappear. Cherish it. Do your best. If you do have to give the baby up for adoption because there is no other way, never blame yourself or feel you failed; giving your child a chance at life, even if s/he is raised by another, loving couple, is no failure at all.



In the future, why not consider reevaluating your views of sex and what it is really there for? You can start all over again. This was written with young people in mind and could help you to rediscover yourself: http://chastity.com/node/21



You can e-mail me anytime you want if you need to talk to someone, okay? [e-mail]



You will be okay and will get through this. Remember, hard times pass. Your baby will be your reward.

Answer 11

The first thing to do is to be honest with your parents. Tell them and they will be able to get you the help you need. Everyone makes mistakes, believe me. I can guarantee your parents will not be happy, but they love you and will help you. If you really care about this child you are growing inside you, you should grow up and get help. You are just a child yourself and cannot handle this on your own. I am 22 years old and pregnant with my first, and I am scared and need all the support I can get. I know you need support and help, so please tell your parents so they can help you!

Answer 12

dont get an abortion. im 17 and pregnant its hard but so worth it in the end. You might have made a mistake but its over now your okay. A baby is a blessing dont take it as a nightmare. And i love them names you have picked out. Just take care of yourself dont let nothing anyone says get to you because believe me they will say stuff they said stuff about me too tho. And im proud of people like you to be brave and to not get down about it . You will be find. Now you could look forward too picking out baby stuff:) .. they have so many cute outfits and everything you will love it . :) . eat healthy. good luck to you and your baby :) def tell the daddy so he could at least help you out . my babys daddy was so happy im living with him now and were having a great life. and your going to have to tell your parents . its hard and scary believe me i told mine :( lol but they are over it and cant wait to be grandparents. of course they might be mad at first but they wont stay like that for long. And if you think they are going to hit you or something i would wait till there is someone else there so they dont hurt the baby in your belly .

Answer 13

even though this has not happened to me, i suggest for you to tell your parents. they are going to find out sooner or later. i think it's great you are planning to keep it, because abortion is just horrible. since you are only 13, your mother is probably going to volunteer to take care of your baby if she isn't angry, but it doesn't mean she wouldn't help you. you should tell the boy that got you pregnant, if he doesn't want anything to do with the baby then that's his choice, but tell him just in case. this happened to a very close friend of mine and she never told her boyfriend. and when he found out, he was very upset and hurt for keeping the baby a secret. having a baby will be the most difficult thing, but like people say, things happen for a reason.

Answer 14

awww. this made me get a little teary eyed. tell the dad and then tell your parents.

i say tell that dad first because he may or may not care. if he cares you will have him by your side when yall tell yours and his parents. dont let him fool you into thinking he loves and cares about you. you sound like an extremely sweet girl.

are you in the 7th 8th or 9th grade?

and i love sophia and aaden.



telling your parents will be extremely hard. they will be mad and maybe even cry. who knows how it will go. every situation is different. just be strong and dont let anyone force you into doing anything you dont wanna do. no you are not consider an adult now and you still need to listen to your parents but when it comes to your baby its YOUR decision.



and how old is the dad?

Answer 15

Well i think it's great that you're taking responsibility for your actions. And as for your mom and dad it would probably be best for you to just tell them don't wait til you start showing that will hurt them and make them think that you don't believe that you can come to them for help. Please get prenatal care soon you need to make sure you and your baby are healthy especially because you are so young. And always remember even if you are not a christian god is someone you can always turn to no matter what you do.Good luck:)

Answer 16

very proud of your determination to take responsibility of your actions.



Yes, the dad will need to know. He has every right. Just prepare yourself for anything. He might deny it, you know he is still young minded. although adults do that too. But yea, he needs to know. I say tell your parents first. not sure what type of parents you have but its never easy. It does hurt. We all want the best for our kids so again, prepare yourself for anything. The sooner you tell them, the quicker it is for you to start moving forward. When you tell your parents, just begin by telling them "mom dad, I really messed up" I messed up really bad, and I need you becuase i believe you are all i have and wont turn your back on me." they will probably guess what it is at that point. I'm a mom of 3 teen girls, and ive been thru it w. one of my daughters, I'm here for her and she's delivering her twin girls in 2 weeks at the age of 18. just be strong and good luck.

Answer 17

You have your mind made up and sound like you have all the answers! You sound pretty strong and mature for a 13 year old if it wasn't for your bad spelling I would think you were alot older! Good Luck!

Answer 18

( Sophia is adorable, I like the spelling Aiden better )





Tell your parents calmly, Explain what happened and it was a mistake. Tell them that you need their support and love to help you..



Tell him calmly and how you feel about it. Give him a moment to sink this all in then ask him how he feels...



Remember to avoid anger when telling them, Stay as calm as you can.



Good Luck

Answer 19

just tell them and deal with it girl. you know you make the mistake so it's time to grow up and tell your parents. basically, you parents will be the one paying for EVERYTHING and provide for your own baby. how do that sounds? selfish.

having a baby at your age is really complicated! You still a child yourself and i don't even think that you know anything about baby and how hard it is to be mother. Having a baby is not like babysitting or not like having a baby doll. babies is really expansive.

Tell your parents so they can help you.

Answer 20

I AINT GONNA JUDGE YOU....CAUSE I'M 18 AND PREGOS....BUT YOU DID MAKE A MISTAKE IN TRUSTIN DA GUY....YOU SHOULD KNOW DAT ALL HE WANTED WAS SEX...TELLIN YOUR PARENTS IS DA HARD PART BUT IF THEY LOVE YOU THEY R GONNA UNDERSTAND. OF COURSE THEY ARE GONNA WANNA MURDER HIM BUT THEY'LL GET OVER IT. DONT TELL DA GUY UNLESS HE'S STILL TALKIN TO U AFTER THAT NIGHT. IF HE ISN'T DONT EVEN BOTHER CAUSE HE'S GONNA DENIE IT AND TELL YOU HE AINT THE DADDY....JUST HAVE FAITH AND BE STRONG FOR U AND YOUR BABY CAUSE NOW ITS NOT ONLY BOUT U ITS ALSO BOUT UR BABY AND YOU HAVE TO THINK BOUT BOTH OF U NOW. HE'S A BLESSIN LOVE HIM/HER WITH ALL UR HEART AND NEVER FORGET THAT GOD IS ALWAYS LOOKIN DOWN ON US.

Answer 21

Wait for a quiet time to tell your parents when you won't be rushed. You might want to tell the calmer one first. If you don't know how to start, you might start by printing out your question, and saying, "Mom, Dad, this is mine."



PLEASE consider adoption. There are so many couples who are READY and would love to raise your baby!

Answer 22

So what's your question?