Can u help please Abortion?

JVR

2010-08-04 17:41:58 UTC

Your boyfriend is a COWARD. He's just saying that cause he wants no responcibilty. Do what YOU want. Adoption is nice, but once you get into the moment you won't want to give it up. Abortion is the easy way out but I suggest you keep it.

?

2010-08-05 00:55:49 UTC

WOW. Your boyfriend sounds like a jerk (the nicest way yahoo would let me describe him). Leave his butt! Keep your baby! Unless you want to be a murderer... If i were you, I would either keep the baby or give it up for adoption. Abortion is cruel... What if your mom had aborted you? 12 weeks pregnant is rather far along for an abortion! That's just straight up murdering your own child! A part of you. Think about all those couples out there who want a baby, but can't have one... You have this amazing opportunity that a lot of people do not have. Your boyfriend sounds like an immature pus**. He's not a real man. You should keep the baby and maybe give him the rights to see it when it's born. (If he's not still a moron).

Once you get an abortion you can't turn back.. I know someone who had one and she still cries and regrets it. What are you going to do if you have an abortion, then your boyfriend leaves you? Get depressed because he was going to leave you if you didn't get an abortion, so you got one and he left you anyway? You're 15 years old... You still have MANY good years to find someone better. Having a child that loves you, and needs you is the most amazing gift you can ever receive.

I hope you pick adoption or keeping the baby!

2010-08-05 01:08:33 UTC

What do you want to do ?....

This is your body your baby and your choice...

Your boyfriend is beign selfish... like most young boys who think they are big enough for the responsibility of unprotected sex yet run when it catches up with them... him saying you have to get an abortion is out of order also him saying if his mum finds out is a way of laying a guilt trip on you to control you also him saying he will leave you if you don't well he can't love you because trust me if he did he would support you NO MATTER WHAT...

Your mum well she is probably upset that her baby is growing up and well as she feels is throwing her life away..

Trust me you are not throwing your life away just taking a different path if you keep this baby, Im sure your mum will stick by you if you decide to keep this baby as well she doesn't seem to want you to have an adoption...

Personally i have a daughter who is 14 and if she was in your position once i calmed down i would support her..

Please do not make any decisions based on your boyfriends attempts at guilt trips..

As for college you CAN still do all that.. I am a mum of 3 and pregnant with my 4th and trust me i currently work full time in a very good job.. I have been to college since having the children and i did sign up to uni before i fell pregnant with this baby which i have placed on hold but i will resume once baby is here...

There are options out there so please do not rush into any drastic decisions..

Also i do not want to scare you but if you are 12 weeks then the abortion option is well lets just say becoming less of an option and well if you were to go thru with this option it will be more traumatic for you

You need to think about how you feel about this baby and how you will feel with each of the options open to you i.e how would you feel in a yrs time if you either aborted or adopted out... how would you feel in 5 yrs time.... how would you feel on the day that would of been the babys birthday, these are all things that you need to really consider NOT how your boyfriend feels or what affect this will have on him but what affect this will have on YOU... like i said your body your choice

1 thing to think about.... A very close friend of mine was in your position she had the abortion and well things didn't go to plan... now she can not have babies... I know not all abortions have complications but people telling you that you are young and can have kids later well you do not know what will happen in the future... so please think carefully and do not make a decision based on someone elses wishes

Yes you are young but your not the 1st

good luck

?

2010-08-05 16:19:09 UTC

if you want to have an abortion then you should have one, but you should not do it because you feel pressured to. Adoption is a good option, but it is often hard to give a baby up. I was only 15 when i had my daughter and it doesnt have to stop you going to college. i went back to school and i am taking my GCSE's next year witheveryone else, and then i'm going to college. it sounds like your boyfriend is completely over reacting about the whole situation, its as much his fault as yours that you are having this problem. Personally i would never have an abortion but if you feel it is right go ahead. While your friends and family can offer support and advice no one can make the descision for you, this is the time to grow up and do what you want to do not what everyone else wants.

canned.ice69

2010-08-05 19:11:56 UTC

I'm shocked at how many people say abortion.

Abortion is never the way. You won't regret having your child. If the father doesn't want to be a part of your son/daughters life then thats his loss. Everybody will love the child to bits nobody will hate the child.

You also have the chance of miscarriage, if the baby isn't meant to be you will miscarry. My mother had 3 miscarriages (2 with twins 1 blighted ovum) I had 1 blighted ovum. Giving birth and being pregnant is the best feeling ever. Having your own child in your arms for the first time is incredible. I have a son and I'm pregnant with another. I am 16 and I don't regret it. My son makes me laugh every single day, he makes me smile, he has shown me the most powerful love. Just keep the baby. It may be difficult but you will never regret your child.

2010-08-05 00:41:10 UTC

Keep your child. Everyone is pushing you towards abortion but this question made it very obvious that that's not what you want to do. Don't get an abortion just because that's what everyone else wants. You're the only person who has to live with that decision for the rest of your life. I don't think you would ever regret keeping and raising your child. But if you get an abortion or choose adoption, most likely you will regret it always.

2010-08-05 01:33:35 UTC

Oooh, poor thing, you must be really frightened.

Talk to the Angels that surround you right now.

The baby was invited here and it should also have a choice. Do you think it was right to choose you to be it's mum?

You are very young, too young to be having a sexual relationship and that is a big worry.

I would ask your doctor if you are able to give birth safely at your age, if he is 100 per cent certain that it will not affect your health you can keep that choice open.

Now, your boyfriend....hmmm...he's very scared, why? first of all he may be over 15 which means that sex with you is illegal and that may be his first worry, he doesn't want to be branded a paedophile or get into trouble with the police. Secondly, he is very immature if he thinks you should end a pregnancy just so that his mum won't tell him off. ( I doubt she would kick him out in reality and she may even talk him into being responsible and supporting you in whatever you decide to do.)

As for him threatening to dump you if his mum finds out - again that is extremely childish behaviour and understandable at his age. If he threatens to dump you or tries to bully you into an abortion he is unworthy of your love anyway. It is highly likely that if he was older he would have been really happy. It isn't your fault that you are pregnant, he had underage sex with you and he was just as responsible for contraception as you. If he is older than you he should have been mature enough to wait until you were both old enough to bring up a baby if pregnancy occurred.

Let's assume you now have had an abortion, do you think he will really be there for you? He may be until you have recovered, just long enough to keep you quiet and away from his mum, but what then? Are you both going to agree not to have sex again in case it happens again? I doubt he will be happy with that, so far he seems rather selfish in attitude, I reckon he will leave unless you have sex again. Does he also talk you into not using condoms as it stops his pleasure? -you know that this guy isn't going to be there for you long term. If he was he would be talking about marriage when he gets older and would be supporting his future wife and mother of his child.

Maybe he will come around to the idea too late and never get over it.

To those who tell you to have your career and forget the baby, there are colleges that help single parents, your boyfriend will have to by law pay you some money when he gets a job, and you can return to college after having the baby, some women who have a career first find they are too old by the time they are ready to have kids anyway.

To those who tell you that you can have kids later - sometimes abortions make women infertile so this is not 100 per cent the case. Can you live with that if it happens?

You should be prepared in case it does.

At your age I said I would never have kids, at 20 I still said the same, but at 26 I wanted kids and had them...so you may not feel the same as you get older about the decisions you make now.

If your boyfriend and mum supported you in any of the three choices you make it would have been easier for you.

As it stands your boyfriend gives you one option - abortion.

Your mum gives you 2 options - abortion or keep it.

Ask yourself if your boyfriend is thinking about you or himself?

Same goes for your Mum who may be frightened of bringing up a baby for you but realises that you may regret giving it away in the future.

So stop considering their wishes and decide what is best for you and your baby.

If your friend or someone else supports you 100 per cent in all 3 decisions then try to spend time only with them while you think it through.

If you do say goodbye to your baby it may help to give it a name, light a candle and say goodbye properly and always remember it. Maybe even ask it to come back to you another time.

This is not something a child should ever have to decide, but you have to make this decision all by yourself. Good luck, all the best x

2010-08-05 00:49:03 UTC

If you are not 100% certain about abortion, you will regret it the rest of your life. You will regret it more than loosing that moron boyfriend of yours. He is a coward, and you need a better man than that piece of trash. And no, adoption is not stupid, ask parents who have been able to become parents because women gave them the chance of raising their children.

I know it sounds impossible, but there will come a time when you will not think much about this guy, and you won't feel anything for him when you do. Seriously, loosing him will not pain you for the rest of your life, I know what I am talking about. But an abortion might haunt you forever. Seriously, this guy is not worth it, and in a couple of years, you will remember my words.

Oh, and BS about his mom kicking him out, she can't, unless he is 18 or more in which case he should get a job and move out.

?

2010-08-05 01:13:21 UTC

Do what's best for you, and you alone.

Just be aware that whatever choice you make there will be no going back. It's a very difficult situation, and given that you are already 12 weeks it's one that needs to made soon. Either option will be hard in it's own way.

Abortion does not make you evil, adoption does not make you a saint, and keeping the child does not have to mean your life is over (but it does mean it has to/will change).

2010-08-05 01:47:46 UTC

knowone knows YOU better then YOU,

its your body, your feelings,your life and your decision only.

i got pregnant at 16 and my dad and boyfriend forced me to have an abortion and dragged me to the appointment.

i hated my dad for this for ages (not because i had an abortion but because i hadn't decided what i wanted to do yet) and my stupid boyfriend broke up with me anyway the very next year anyway because i got pregnant to him again and kept my baby and im so glad i did because i look at her now knowing that i thought of aborting her then i thought of having her addopted out and i cry that i could even think those things about her, i kept her she is 12yo now and i have gone on to have three other kids who i love with my whole heart, so my point is its a lifetime decision so take all the time you need to decide on whats best for you and only you as it is your life that will be changed for good either way.good luck with it..

?

2010-08-05 00:41:53 UTC

This is her choice, and hers alone. She has to do what is right for her. No one can make that decision for her or force her into a decision that she doesn't agree with. The bf is going to be gone regardless....as soon as she has an abortion he will leave her. Just a statistical fact. I wish her the best and give her a hug.

?

2010-08-05 00:56:12 UTC

FiRST OFF YOUR MAN'S AN ***!!! HOW CAN HE TELL YOU HE'LL LEAVE YOU iF YOU HAVE HiS KiD?!?! iT iS YOUR BODY AND YOUR CHOiCE. iF YOU WANT TO HAVE THE BABY THEN DO SO, ADOPTiON iS A VERY HARD BUT iT HAS SOME ADVANTAGES. YOUR BABY CAN BE GiVEN A LiFE THAT HE OR SHE WiLL DESERVE. YOU CAN HAVE AN OPED ADOPTiON, MEANiNG YOU GET UPDATES ABOUT YOUR BABY AND ViSiTS LATER ON iN THE BABY'S LiFE. i THiNK iT WOULD BE BETTER FOR YOU TO NOT BE WiTH HiM BECAUSE HE'S NOT DOiNG ANYTHiNG TO HELP OR BE SUPPORTiVE HE'S ONLY WORRiED ABOUT SAViNG HiS OWN *** NOT ABOUT YOU OR YOUR FEELiNGS. DROP THAT LOSER, AND DEAL WITH THiS WiTH YOUR MOM. YOU DONT NEED HiM TRUST ME. GOOD LUCK AND PLEASE BE SMART WiTH WHAT YOU CHOOSE.

((iM NOT SHOUTiNG AT YOU, THATS WHAT THE SiDE BAR SAYS iT LOOKS LiKE LOL,, SORRY))

?

2010-08-05 00:57:24 UTC

Don't get the abortion you are killing gods child that he gave to you think about your life after you will be happy put the baby in daycare if you go collage. That is what my sister did. If you have a abortion many woman have flash backs from when they were taking it out. the abortion can damage your organs and you can even die from this.

If your mom is caring she will understand take in your boyfriend when he tells his mom. Even if you do have to give away the baby you might not want to do a closed adoption so you can check in on him once in a while

~California Girl

?

2010-08-05 00:53:48 UTC

I have had an abortion, I didnt want to at all, i was 17 yrs old, and my parents and everyone pressured me into it. Plus I didnt have ANY money to support a baby, so... i finally agreed to do it. It was terribly sad and I was extremely extremely depressed after i wanted to die... but, I got to graduate high school and the experience made me stronger because you eventually learn that you need to move on. and the experience really made me closer with my boyfriend because he was supportive of my feelings afterward. Now, years later, we are married and have a baby girl on the way and couldnt be happier.

Imagine bringing your baby into the world and hearing them take their first breathe and cry for the first time and wanting to hold your little one, and then they take him/her away from you and you dont ever get to spend time with them again. thats adoption.

I'd say keep the baby and raise it yourself, but you still have so much school to get through and I know you couldnt possibly afford a baby right now... so if you have the right support system behind you. keep it.

i would get an abortion. Take time to heal, get through school, have lots of fun with friends, then someday meet the right man and have a baby. But thats just what I would do.

chris ellaway

2010-08-05 00:42:07 UTC

Do whatevers right for yourself! Your mother should support you no matter what and for your boyfriend... if he feels like that, then hun he dont deserve you! ITs your body and the only person who will get hurt out of this decision is you! Do what you think is best and ignore your mum and bf if the choices they think are right arent what you think is right! Goodluck whatever decision you make xx

?

2010-08-05 00:46:21 UTC

Do what ever you think is best, no one can force you into having an abortion.

and if your boyfriend said hed brake up with you if you kept it thrre is something wrong.

i know you have things you wanna do in your life but some things are meant to be.

Don't let anyone pull you down from what you believe

?

2010-08-05 00:41:27 UTC

You can still go to college and everything.. I was a teen mom and I completed high school and I had another baby when I was 20 and I am in college now at 24 I am almost 8 months with my 3rd... please do not kill you baby...... That is so wrong....

?

2010-08-05 00:43:36 UTC

Well, i'm not quite sure, just talk to your friends about it.

Or your mom, i mean, she's there for you, isn't she?

And get rid of your boyfriend, if he says he's gonna do something he'd better do it. Just shows that he's a jerk and doesn't care about you.

Or get a journal and write what you feel.

Or you can just talk to me, i'm 14, for all that matters, and can listen to what you wanna sayyy.

Hope things go well.

2010-08-05 01:35:47 UTC

Your tears prove everything: you do not want to abort your baby. You feel pressured, but you love your child; otherwise, you would not cry. I highly doubt you will have the abortion.

When people say you can "have kids later," they are forgetting that there is *already* a child in your life who can't just be erased or saved for later. If you abort, you will suffer all your life from it, especially because you don't want to do it. Keeping your child brings tremendous joy.

I'm not being sentimental. I do know how challenging motherhood can be, but I want to reassure you: the challenges of motherhood improve you. You learn how to love another human being more than yourself, to love unconditionally, to give without counting the cost, to manage time wisely. You have the joy of watching your child grow.

Your baby isn't here to burden you, but to teach you something about life. If you give your baby all your love, s/he will give it all back a hundred times. I can't describe to you what it's like to hold your newborn for the first time; time stops and you fall deeply in love, the purest love there is. Let yourself know this love.

Yes, children require a lot of attention, but you will adjust. Family WILL help, no matter what they say now. You still have your whole life ahead of you, and your baby will not stop that. This is just a new challenge, not the end of your life. College will always be there. Go ahead and keep your baby and pursue your dreams and prove to those around you that when you are determined and have love in your heart, you are capable of anything. Ask a school counselor for help about continuing your education.

You must be so hurt, but you're a mother and you've got to love your baby unconditionally and be strong. The weaker people see you, the more they will pressure you. You need to make a firm decision with your will: "I will not have an abortion. No one can make me. I am going to get through this and my baby will be my inspiration for everything I do to better my life." Then, make this 100% clear to everyone who is bothering you and never waver on it.

Progress with your pregnancy and things will fall into place. People will accept it. Your mother will help you in the end. Your baby already looks like this! http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_X-KjiazfRYk/TBz8mrhQ2qI/AAAAAAAABNQ/nJwWT2oknls/s320/12-weeks-pregnant.jpg Never betray your baby for anyone's sake! The love between a mother and baby is priceless. Protect your baby with all your heart.

You are at your second trimester, and an abortion would destroy your baby in a most terrible way. You can read about the methods here http://www.abortionincanada.ca/methods/index.html if you need to.

Women who have abortions suffer all their lives, even those who deny it. There are many physical complications http://www.abortionincanada.ca/health/index.html , but perhaps the worst of them is a 40% increased risk of breast cancer http://www.abortionbreastcancer.com/press_releases/100106/index.htm .

There is SO much help for you out there. Pregnancy care centers will help you for FREE with talking to your parents, getting you all the baby supplies you need, finding a place to live for a while if necessary, getting legal/medical/financial/social support. All for free. Call this toll-free number 1-800-550-4900 or go to these sites to find a center near you:

http://www.standupgirl.com/index.php?option=com_weblinks&view=category&id=72&Itemid=23

http://www.birthright.org/htmpages/locate.htm

Don't give up or despair! Let people help you. Also, breastfeed (no cost at all, best for baby), make your own baby food, use cloth diapers instead of disposables (so cute today--Google that), and buy everything used. These things will save you SO much money.

Your boyfriend has to be involved in the baby's life somehow, but not in yours. He doesn't deserve you and he's used you. He wants you to do the most horrible thing to his and your child. Please consider stepping back from him and rediscovering your value and self-respect by abstaining http://www.chastity.com/node/21 so you can find out what sex, love and fertility are really all about. You deserve so much better. Now is the time to make changes.

I am here for you. You don't know me, but I am willing to help you in any way I can, even if you just want someone to vent to. Honestly, I would love to hear from you and help you through: sunshine1203@ymail.com

You are going to be okay and have a good life with this baby. These hard days will pass. Babies are not as expensive and difficult as society says; use your head, be thrifty, and give this baby all you've got. I don't know if you believe in God, but He is with you. When everyone else fails you, He will not. He is faithful. Ask Him for guidance, even if you aren't used to praying, and He will always help you. He can handle your pain.

Cheer up. You are stronger than you know. I am here for you: sunshine1203@ymail.com. And don't forget Birthright: 1-800-550-4900

2010-08-05 00:44:00 UTC

I am really against abrortion unless it's taking the "day after" pill.. but its too late for that.. Look at this.. It will make you think twice. http://www.abortiontv.com/Pics/AbortionPictures-FirstTrimester2.htm

Not trying to gross you out or scare you but your baby has a heartbeat, the baby IS alive..